Ass Gaskets

This IS the Best Blog on the Planet

awesome graph

I hope you people realize how lucky you are every day to be able to read and watch my thoughts. I am, without a doubt, the PREMIERE blogger/journalist/person/content creator/videographer/etc/etc on the internet or any series of networked computers for that matter. I am, in a way, an internet deity. You do not have to worship me but you should or you will feel my wrath.

I have painstakingly drawn for you a chart showing how I made the internet the awesome thing that it is today. You can see that although 56k modems made the internet ‘neat’ and animated GIFs made the internet ‘super’ it was me FITZ that made the internet ‘fucking awesome’. So in honor of that….tonight or tomorrow I am changing the theme of this site to something a little more readable and a lot less cluttered. I feel that since my words and videos are so extremely important I need to make sure you can access it with ease from whatever feeble and inferior device you use to access the internet that I made awesome.

You may experience glitches during this period. You may for a minute or two NOT be able to access my sacred scribblings and videos. I do not want widespread panic during this time. You should not attempt to harm yourself or others if you cannot access this, the holiest of holy websites. Fear not my virtual children…..Fitz is here for the long haul and he has barely begun to show his awesomeness.

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  • Joker

    You forgot to have the graph shoot spiraling downwards with the rise of “All your bases are belong to us”

  • http://www.toiletscribble.com fitz

    I do not like to talk about negative things. This blog is all about positivity. For example, I am positive that I am the coolest person in the known universe.

  • Fitzgroupie

    Fitz,

    When you’re right, you’re right. You can’t help it.

  • http://www.toiletscribble.com fitz

    Groupie – You’re right…I can’t help it. I was actually born this awesome. Not my fault.

  • http://modernurbanliving.com Tracy

    Your so vain, I bet you think this song about you. Don’t you? Don’t YOU?

    Tracy recently scribbled the following on their toilet (I mean blog)..X-Rated Park Planters.

  • http://www.toiletscribble.com fitz

    Tracy – that song IS about me so…..

  • http://www.toiletscribble.com/rants/the-sneaker-challenge/ The Sneaker Challenge | Toilet Scribble

    [...] today I got an email regarding my post entitled “This is the BEST Blog Ever”. Not only did the author of this email challenge my assertion that toiletscribble.com is the best [...]

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