Rants and Raves, politics

Getting Arrested for Blogging?

prostituteI received a few messages today about bloggers getting arrested for….well…blogging. Weird shit right?! One story was about the increase of arrests in countries like Egypt, China and Pakistan and another was about a US citizen that was arrested in Singapore for insulting a judge on his blog. I believe he commented that the judge was ‘prostituting herself’ and obviously I don’t think he meant it literally.

In any event, I sort of feel that I need to speak out on the subject. After all I am a blogger I guess and well, it wouldn’t make me happy if I was arrested. Granted this is not a political blog and I doubt anyone wants to arrest me for helping people identify douche bags or for posting pictures of toilet graffiti. Never the less I want to show my solidarity so here we go.

I challenge the countries of Singapore, China, Egypt and Pakistan to arrest me. Why would they do so? This is why:

1. I declare that the Chinese government is comprised solely of men with penises under one inch in length. That’s right, you are all small dicked losers that obviously cannot get it up. And hell, even if you could get it up it wouldn’t have that far to go since it’s fucking tiny. Oh, and Chinese President Hu Jintao likes to wear pantyhose under his faggy military uniform. These are indisputable facts.

2. It is a known fact that Egyptian government officials are all homosexual and love to perform fellatio on donkeys.

3. True story, Pakistan government officials watch child pornography on a daily basis and love to perform re-enactments of the two girls one cup video.

4. The judge in Singapore that had that blogger arrested is not only a prostitute but she only charges $4 for anal and will go ass to mouth for an additional fifty cents.

So there ya go. I challenge these countries to hunt me down and arrest me. I also challenge that Singapore judge to find one person that wants to have sex with her.

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  • Joker

    Couple problems with your arguments, my dear fitz.

    1) Did you not say in a previous post that all dicks were exactly the same? What makes the Chinese Government so different? Besides the fact, of course that they are all douchebags. (There’s an Idea for Don’t be a douche 11: Don’t be in the Chinese Government)

    2) If you ever mention two girls one cup again in your entire life, I will pull out all your entrails with a rusty iron glove, then tie them in a rope, and hang you with them, then when you’re dead, I’ll have a gay, sweaty sumo wrestler perform CPR on you and bring you back to life, then cut off your “Little Fitz” and make you eat it while watching two girls one cup…

    :D

  • http://www.toiletscribble.com fitz

    Joker – Well aren’t you the keen observer of detail? Oh how I really hate you :) Truth be told, there are exceptions to my “All penises are the same length” theory. In fact, in China there are 700 million or so exceptions.

    As for two girls one cup I was wondering if you want to go out tonight with me and get some chocalate ice cream.

  • Joker

    Okay!

    Waaaait a minute…

    Are you trying to trick me? Fitz you sly dog.

  • http://www.toiletscribble.com fitz

    Joker – Trick you how????

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