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Ten Things to Try at Work

04.17.08 | View Comments

Here is a small list of ideas for you to try out at your place of business. Some or all of them may get you fired so don’t complain here if you do.

office pranks

1. Walk into an elevator that has one other person in it and stand right next to them as if there is no room. If they move follow.

2. Buy a sandwich and walk into the reception area of a different company in your building. Deliver the sandwich to the receptionist and tell her it’s a delivery for Bob in accounting. Leave before she can ask any questions.

3. Call your computer help desk and complain that every time you go to Google you are being redirected to random pornographic websites. Then surf porn all day and if caught explain that you have a ticket open about the problem and it’s not your fault. If you have an especially slow help desk or they all sit in India you now have a license to surf porn all day without consequence.

4. Send a blank email with the subject “About Last Night” to a few of your co-workers and then immediately recall the message. Then when they ask you what the email was about put on a very concerned face and say “Please tell me you were not able to read that”. Offer no other details.

5. Hang ‘out of order’ signs on copiers, fax machines or any other office equipment. At the bottom of the sign also put “Any questions  or concerns, please call (insert phone extension of a hated co-worker)”.

6. Send out a meeting request for a surprise birthday party for a non-existent coworker. See how many people show up.

7. Call a co-worker’s phone extension. When they pick up pretend they called you and ask what they want. Repeat several times and pretend to be more and more annoyed each time and then tell them you don’t appreciate their jokes while you are trying to get your job done.

8. Leave a condom wrapper in a bathroom stall.

9. Tiptoe down a hallway and feign like you are in pain and keep saying “Hot Hot Hot Hot”.

10. Pretend to have laryngitis for the entire day. When leaving for the night loudly say “have a good night” to your entire office.

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  • http://mugslug.com George Leontaris

    hahahaahahaahahaha

    George Leontaris’s last blog post..Oatmeal Pancakes!!!

  • Eddie

    Thanks for those ideas, i like the one for the helpdesk, we should try that here..LOL

  • http://www.datingwallofshame.blogspot.com juliemccoy

    I love the one “About Last Night” email idea, but the condom wrapper is pretty funny too. For women, it should be a Summer’s Eve towelette pkg. – but, sadly, I have seen those left in a stall at work!

    juliemccoy’s last blog post..Single vs. Available – Poly vs. Cheating

  • http://modernurbanliving.com Tracy

    Haha too much! Darn it why do you never have a condom when you need it?

    Tracy’s last blog post..Ladies and gentlemen, The Amazing Folding Chair!

  • http://pointless-drivel.com Mr. Fabulous

    Hmm…I might actually try a couple of those…

    Mr. Fabulous’s last blog post..Where are the killer robots?

  • zobi

    I’m nervous enough just reading this blog on my work laptop. No thanks.

  • http://www.toiletscribble.com fitz

    George: Your my boy but your comments always suck

    Eddie: Try it…you’ll love it.

    Tracy: You should always have 3 condoms on you in sizes small, medium, and OMG.

    Julie: I would suggest you hang around the ladies room and have a conversation while holding a bottle of Summer’s Eve. Don’t try to hid it.

    Mr. Fabulous: Please do let me know how it turns out. Especially if you get in any kind of trouble.

  • http://www.toiletscribble.com fitz

    Zobi: If your job doesn’t like you visiting my blog you really shouldn’t be working there. Where the fuck are your priorities???

  • http://www.datingwallofshame.blogspot.com juliemccoy

    Here are some more ideas for you~

    HOW TO TICK PEOPLE OFF

    1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
    2. In the memo field of all your checks, write “for sexual favors.”
    3. Specify that your drive-through order is “TO-GO.”
    4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
    5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
    6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions “to keep them tuned up.”
    7. Reply to everything someone says with “that’s what you think.”
    8. Practice making fax and modem noises.
    9. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and “cc” them to your boss.
    10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
    11. Finish all your sentences with the words “in accordance with prophesy.”
    12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
    13. Disassemble your pen and “accidentally” flip the ink cartridge across the room.
    14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
    15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you “like it that way.”
    16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
    17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.
    18. Honk and wave to strangers.
    19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
    20. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
    21. type only in lowercase.
    22. dont use any punctuation either
    23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
    24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
    “DO YOU HEAR THAT?”
    “What?”
    “Never mind, it’s gone now.”
    25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
    26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce “No, wait, I messed it up,” and repeat.
    27. Ask people what gender they are.
    28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
    29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
    30. Sing along at the opera.
    31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn’t rhyme.
    32. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about “psychological profiles.”

    juliemccoy’s last blog post..Six Words~

  • http://www.toiletscribble.com fitz

    julie, I do #2 all the time. And I mean the check thing…NOT pooping…well I do that all the time too but don’t we all?

  • cabavision

    Put ketchup packets under the toilet seat in the womens bathroom. Hopefully a fat coworker sits on it. Classic!!!!

  • http://www.datingwallofshame.blogspot.com juliemccoy

    ok, Mr. Hanky~

    juliemccoy’s last blog post..Six Words~

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