Here is a small list of ideas for you to try out at your place of business. Some or all of them may get you fired so don’t complain here if you do.
1. Walk into an elevator that has one other person in it and stand right next to them as if there is no room. If they move follow.
2. Buy a sandwich and walk into the reception area of a different company in your building. Deliver the sandwich to the receptionist and tell her it’s a delivery for Bob in accounting. Leave before she can ask any questions.
3. Call your computer help desk and complain that every time you go to Google you are being redirected to random pornographic websites. Then surf porn all day and if caught explain that you have a ticket open about the problem and it’s not your fault. If you have an especially slow help desk or they all sit in India you now have a license to surf porn all day without consequence.
4. Send a blank email with the subject “About Last Night” to a few of your co-workers and then immediately recall the message. Then when they ask you what the email was about put on a very concerned face and say “Please tell me you were not able to read that”. Offer no other details.
5. Hang ‘out of order’ signs on copiers, fax machines or any other office equipment. At the bottom of the sign also put “Any questions or concerns, please call (insert phone extension of a hated co-worker)”.
6. Send out a meeting request for a surprise birthday party for a non-existent coworker. See how many people show up.
7. Call a co-worker’s phone extension. When they pick up pretend they called you and ask what they want. Repeat several times and pretend to be more and more annoyed each time and then tell them you don’t appreciate their jokes while you are trying to get your job done.
8. Leave a condom wrapper in a bathroom stall.
9. Tiptoe down a hallway and feign like you are in pain and keep saying “Hot Hot Hot Hot”.
10. Pretend to have laryngitis for the entire day. When leaving for the night loudly say “have a good night” to your entire office.
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