Toilet Scribble

It’s the year 3010 in midtown Manhattan. A huge UFO lands and a few dozen alien creatures step out onto what once was fifth avenue. It’s now nothing but a wasteland. These visitors are archeologists from another planet in another galaxy in a parallel universe. They are doing what archeologists do, dig up shit, look at it and then proclaim “Wow, look at this thing from the past”.

Andy is the lead alien archeologist. He is on the hunt today for something called ‘The Internet’. Apparently the creatures that inhabited planet Earth had a series of what they called ‘networked computers’ that stored and served information. The creatures, humans as they were called, used to enter information into this internet system constantly right up until the destruction of the planet in Earth Year 2009 when a world riot started over the reinstatement of a terrible leader known as George Bush or ‘Dubya’ to his local populace.

Andy had searched many times before today and never came up with anything but a few things called ‘floppy disks’ and ‘compact discs’ that apparently were created by a company called AOL. The AOL company would give them away to the population of the Earth in an attempt to get them to connect to the internet. But the internet itself Andy could not find.

Today was Andy’s lucky day though. He had stumbled upon something called ‘The Secret New York City Googleplex’. It was a building rumored to have a disk that contained the entire internet in it’s final form. He wandered the ruins of the Googleplex and low and behold…..THE INTERNET. He quickly grabbed the disk containing the internet and brought it back to his native planet for further research.

After configuring his Linux based computer to read this ancient disk he loaded up the ancient search page called google.com. This was apparently the entrance page used to find things on the internet. “Give me a word to search for!” Andy shouted to one of his colleagues. Andy was so excited he could barely even think of a word to type. What wonderful treasures of the past was he about to stumble upon? “Toilet!” his colleague snapped back as he walked into the bathroom. Andy typed slowly….T…O…I…L…E…T.  He hit the “I’m feeling lucky” button on the Google search monster. “Hmm, what is Toilet Scribble?” he wondered to himself. He clicked the link and started reading a post called “What if Aliens Find This Post in the Rubble”. Andy’s head instantly exploded.

And you thought these posts were just mindless babble?